I'm about to email my ex. Know any good insults I can hurl at her?

I already have:


-have you cheated on your new boyfriend yet? If not, what's keeping you?





-You know those back-boobs you get when you wear your bra? They didn't stand out so much last time I saw you.





-The dog tells me he's happier with you gone.





-You know, you and your sister look alike naked, too.





-So, are the benefits good working part time at Walmart?





Thanks in advance...
I'm about to email my ex. Know any good insults I can hurl at her?
Have you asked your doctor yet if Valtrex is right for you?





How's that rash coming along?
Reply:Since my entire life is comprised of movie one liners, cartoon songs and bad commercial jingles that swirl around in my head endlessly I prob have a million. But I'ma throw a different one at ya. "You know you are over someone when you have the chance to finally get even and you don't take it". Having gone through a 2+ year brutal divorce I can absolutely sympathize but it's not worth it. One day you will bump into her out somewhere. Smile and walk off with your head hung high. Your happiness is what will crush her in the end. I have to go shower now because I feel dirty for answering a question seriously.
Reply:I already told you, #1


1. You look more wrinkled now that you've lost weight.


2. Why is your boyfriend emailing me and asking me to take you back?


3. You should really consider having a stitch put in your vagina cause, well, it's really stretched. And it's actually very ugly.


4. They are having a buy one get one free Masengil sale, you need a loan?


and lastly





5. I hate you more than I hate genital warts
Reply:those are good ones you should also add hey that rash you on legs has it healed it








I can see why I drank so much while I was with you








people like you is what makes suicide a better reason than staying with you





add to the sister one that your sister is better in bed than she is
Reply:One advice I give to all girls...Don't lower yourself to another person's level, that would make you lower than dirt...If he goes falls off a cliff?, would you too?? Anyways, if you really want to get him pissed then be nice and keep it really short, that way he will go crazy. But if you insult him, he will just laugh sitting infront of his computer desk.
Reply:Are the 3 of you sleeping in the same bed for warmth yet ?





I hear that they are bailing out the porn industry, when will your check be there ?





You need to shave your pits on the 20th because after that there will be no more Bush.
Reply:What is the point? You are putting way too much energy into asking us, and e-mailing her.





I suggest taking the dog to a dog park and playing some fetch to burn off some anger. Ya can't be mad while playing fetch with a doggy!
Reply:tell her you'll pray for her, it has got to be the ultimate insult and yet a prayer at the same time...it's like nothing on this earth can help you, only our Lord and Savior
Reply:Hey, you know that weird smell that made the house smell like day old sardines and mayo? Well its gone now! Ironically it disappeared the day after you left....
Reply:Have you sorted out your disease yet, hope you have told your new boyfriend.





My dog did a **** on your stuff when you was at work.





I did a fart on your leg whilst you were sleeping.
Reply:how about: "I said all those nice things so that you can sleep with me"


or"remember when i said you looked good in that dress,i meant that your dog looked better"
Reply:well ..................................


isnt it about time you got a real job , so that when you cheat on him , you can support yourself and your back boobs





i dont know dude
Reply:wow, thats horrible, don't bother, im sure she already feels suicidal about now!
Reply:Meanie!!


Stay away from me ):








EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW





There's another meanie below me!


AH!


):
Reply:Here's one...





-I just wanted you to know that you have a huge vagina, and I don't mean that in a good way.
Reply:Tell her this: "I was looking through some pictures and found one of you, I wasn't sure it that was your azz or your face I was staring at"
Reply:You need to douche You smell like tuna!
Reply:Maybe you should grow up and let the past be the past..
Reply:"How are you coping with that house falling on your sister?"
Reply:No. You have all the insults covered. :)
Reply:Did you know your grandma moans exactly like you do when I'm pouring it to her?
Reply:You actually went out with ME!!!
Reply:Your mums WAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY tighter!!!!!
Reply:dont stoop down to her level be the bigger person


good luck


( but if you want to be really childish tp her house }
Reply:"Don't let your mind wander baby. It's way to small to be outside by itself...xxx
Reply:How's that dildo working out for ya?
Reply:I just had a date with my hand, it's a better lay than you...
Reply:i slept with alotta fagina
Reply:Tell her The Mick says "get bent beotch"...she'll know.
Reply:By the way, your vagina is too big.
Reply:How bout ,I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.